April Service Challenge: Forgiveness

Spring has sprung and April is officially here! That means that nicer weather is finally on the way! (that was the sound of the North East Region collectively letting out a sigh of relief) 

More importantly though, this month is of great significance for Christians all around the world. The culmination of Lent (Holy Week) and the death (Good Friday) and resurrection of Jesus Christ (Easter) are all observed this month. 

With that in mind, can you take a guess what this month's service challenge will be? Take a look...

What better time to practice forgiveness in our own lives than the month we commemorate the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus Christ? 

Jesus Christ, the Son of God, died for our sins so that we could be forgiven by God and given eternal life. For that reason, this month's service challenge is centered around the act of forgiveness: of self and others.

Now, for those of you wondering whether forgiveness is considered an act of service or not, allow me to explain because I, too, was on the fence about calling it an act of service but after doing some research, I fully understood why God placed the idea in my heart. It made total sense to me!  

Forgiveness is a gift. It is a gift you give to yourself first and then to others. As such, the gift of forgiveness is probably the greatest act of service you can do for yourself and others.

As for the challenge itself, it's made up of 30 days of forgiveness, 4 forgiveness exercises, and a happier/healthier you because of it.  

Here's how it works: There are 4 forgiveness exercises - one to be completed each week in April. You can take 10-15 minutes a day to work on each exercise or complete the exercise in one sitting. However you choose to do so, I recommend doing it in a quiet room with little distraction.

Here are the Forgiveness Exercises:

Week 1 - Reflect and Acknowledge. Make a list of all the people that have wronged you that you still harbor resentment towards. Write down what they did to you. Next, go down your list and visualize their face, focusing on one individual at a time, and say whatever comes to mind, mentally or verbally, that you have to get off of your chest. End by stating "I CHOOSE to forgive you (name of offender) for hurting me and will not let this hurt control my life any longer. I set you and the burden I carry in my heart free." Repeat it as many times as needed.

Week 2 - Forgiveness letter. Write a letter to the person who's hurt you. The letter can be as long or as short as you like. The point is to let everything you have in your heart, towards that person, out on paper - the anger, the sorrow, the guilt, etc. Make sure you state in your letter that you CHOOSE to forgive the person and set them and the burden you carry in your heart free. Once you are done, burn the letter (preferably outdoors or in a sink) and verbally or mentally state "I forgive you" as it burns.

Week 3 - Light a candle and ask for forgiveness. Because we are not perfect beings, I'm sure we can all think of someone we've hurt or something we've regretted doing in our past. That's where this week's exercise comes in. Using a candle, light it and think of a person (yourself included) whom you have hurt in the past, intentionally or not. Visualize the person's face as you stare at the burning flame and ask that person for forgiveness. Share whatever is in your heart as you sincerely apologize. Once you are done, pause for a moment and imagine yourself receiving their forgiveness. Let it sink in - receive it - and thank them for it.

Week 4 - Praying for God's grace to forgive. Forgiving is not an easy thing to do. In fact, most people can't and don't want to forgive. That is why we must turn to God and pray for the strength to forgive. Feel free to say your own prayer or use the one below that I found online and fell in love with from Lisa Duffy:

Dear God, I come to you with a heart that is heavy with resentment. The hurt I carry with me is taking its toll… slowly closing the door of my heart to love. I have been unjustly hurt and I don’t want to forgive, yet, I beg you to grant me the grace to forgive the one who has hurt me, even though the very thought of doing so is painful to me.

Turn my eyes now to you and show me your wounds. Show me your bloody face. Show me your torn flesh. Help me to always remember that you are the True Victim who was suffered the most unjust hurt ever know to humankind. Give me the grace to be sorrowful for my sins that nailed you to the cross and whisper in my ear your loving words, “Father forgive them for they know not what they do.” With your tenderness, O Lord, I know my heart will melt and be filled with your love, that I may forgive my offender. Amen.

As part of Archbishop Desmond Tutu's forgiveness challenge, which starts May 4th, there is a photo contest that requires that participants post a photo on their social media account of something or someone that represents that week's exercise. I like that idea and would like to incorporate that into this challenge as well. 

So, at the beginning of each week, I'll post a picture that somehow represents that week's exercise so make sure you're following us on Instagram to stay up to date and use the hashtags mentioned in the previous post so that we can stay connected!

**Disclaimer - I am, by no means, an expert on forgiveness or purporting to be one in any way. In fact, those who know me would probably say that I hold grudges and don't easily forgive. There may be some truth to that. However, I'm a strong believer in Maya Angelou's saying: "the first time someone shows you who they are, believe them."

That being said, I believe the misconception is that forgiveness means reconciling, forgetting and approving your offender's hurtful actions towards you. When, in actuality, forgiveness has nothing to do with the offender and everything to do with you. It is a conscious decision you make to release the anger and resentment you have, towards your offender, that is holding you back from moving forward in life.  So, just because you have forgiven someone, whether they know it or not, that doesn't mean you have to restore that relationship.  

Needless to say, I can benefit from this challenge as much as the next person. I need to cleanse my heart of things I still carry with me and my hope is that by sharing this message and taking part in this challenge, we can assist each other in being more at peace with ourselves and others. 

I really hope you'll join me on this journey. 

I'll see you on the other side - happier and healthier than ever before! You deserve it!

Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Ephesians 4:32 (NIV)